Im stressed over this guy :-( |
Hey all.
I'm dating this guy Doug. I like him alot. Were pretty serious now.
The problem is, I get can get so stressed out over him. Other times Im totally fine.
Like weeks we can be sooo close, and other times we can be so distant. It bugs me! If theres a problem, i feel like he distances himself away from me, so he can deal with it on his own. But then I look at it and think, well if we care about each other and we are friends also...why cant he just tell me whats wrong.
I guess maybe we can see a little too muc of each other and it stresses us out. I wanna get into it more, and become even more closer then we are(were practically best friends). But then Im scared of losing that like "attraction" feeling. Like when your so close to someone, you can just kick back and u dont always have to impress them. I am actually debating if I should just CASUALLY date guys...not like have sex with them. But go on dates and flirt. or just stick to this.
Are there any girls who have any tips of just....having a good relationship...getting a guy to not freak out and run off when theres a problem.
Like one week we can see each other all the time, nevber get annoyed...just enjoy each other 100%. then other times we seem like.. were just "dating" and its kinda "fake"
So basically do u guys know of any ways or tips to just not get so upset over guys.
I know this was such a long note...and it probably didnt make much sense. If no one responds to this, Ill just try and think how I can rephrase it. haha
Thanks!
Niki!!!
------------------
*~Niki DeVille*~
Samisunrider 12-22-2002, 06:41 PM Well for starters justify what you mean serious? If your saying your serious with Doug yet are considering dating other blokes just to be flirtious, id say your not serious. Secondly i think you have a clash of personalities, you seem to want to deal with things openly with others while he seems to want to deal with them himself. This was the case with me and my GF, i eventually sat her down and had an adult conversation about it concluding that if she really loved me shed feel safe to open up and let us both deal with a problem. She did, but i think thats a personal thing, better find out if Doug is willing.
EddieDean 12-22-2002, 07:44 PM My boyfriend also can go in "waves," I've noticed. Sometimes he will go for a few weeks without being very affectionate or telling me he loves me, and other times he's the exact opposite. A lot of it depends on what's going on in his life...if he's really busy with schoolwork, he's a little less attentive to me. I've grown to learn that he ALWAYS loves me, sometimes he has more time to focus on our relationship then others. I notice that I'm the same way.
Anyway, from past experience, I will tell you that one of the biggest problems I have had in relationships is creating problems! I notice that, even when things are going fine, I end up finding something to critique about us being together. I've come to the conclusion that I just am not fulfilled. My relationship is great...but something is empty in me and I'm always trying to fill it with HIM. Lately I've started getting involved with different things...taking some classes and meeting some new friends. This has really made me feel a lot better about myself and my relationship.
Maybe you and he are spending too much time together and you need to find some ways to express yourself? If you are truly in a serious relationship, your feelings of doubt are normal.....try to realize that everyone has moods and just because you are feeling down doesn't mean your relationship has a problem. Make sure you have other people and interests in your life, and maybe that will help you feel better about your relationship. Let us know how you are doing!!
jasmine30 12-25-2002, 04:27 PM Hi Niki,
I hope you dont find what Im gonna say offensive but hope it gives you something to seriously think about.By your postings I can tell you are a young girl,maybe 16-17..Am I right?Its normal and a natural thing to want to date and feel close to someone,however your still young and I worry about young girls getting to attached to guys.The main reason being is...you have your whole life ahead of you..so many things to enjoy and do before getting serious...See how you've gotten tied in knots and stressing because Doug is distancing himself from you..Go out and enjoy being a teenager..serious relationships will come in due time..
NikiX5 01-01-2003, 08:26 PM Thanks so much for responding. it honestly helped me alot i sometimes get so nitpicky with guys !!
and i know i shouldnt
|
|
|
|
|
TOP
